The Gunfighters

 Gunfighters (episode 1)

I don’t remember exactly when I first realised there was a thing such as Doctor Who in the world. I used to joke that my first word was Dalek. I recall vividly seeing the inside of a video cover, which promoted Doctor Who videos and being terrified by Jon Pertwee’s face. Strange how you remember things like that, yet don’t remember what you had for tea last week!

Eventually, I saw The Moonbase (yes), The Green Death (terrifying), Pyramids of Mars (more so) and Genesis of the Daleks (you wouldn’t believe quite how terrifying). I was hooked. I even remember finding out that my hero, Jon Pertwee, had died just before a primary school parents night, and for lots of concerned adults to think I was upset about the teachers comments, only for me to cry: “No, Doctor Who died!” I was nine.

Sadly, something even worse threatened to drive a wedge between me and this beloved show.

I think its called “being a teenager” in scientific circles.

I stopped watching the show.

And then, one evening in 2002, I was channel flicking and UK Gold came on. They were showing The Pirate Planet. I remembered it being rubbish.

Five minutes later, I was thinking: “this isn’t so bad!”

Two hours later, Doctor Who and I had been reunited.

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In 2003, I got hold of the First Doctor boxset, three stories in one. Time Meddler was swiftly devoured, as I knew of its strong reputation. Next came The Sensorites, a fairly decent SF romp.

I avoided the final video for several weeks, knowing of its reputation. “Forever a true embarrassment to Doctor Who.” (Ian Levine) “The script was pure Talbot Rothwell, the acting was not even bad vaudeville and the direction was more West Ham than West Coast.” (Peter Haining’s book, though the words were of Jeremy Bentham, who still hates the story even today.)

Finally I gave in. Might as well say I’d seen it! And truth be told, I hadn’t laughed that much in years. I realised that, far from embarrassing, this was comedy gold. If perceived fandom had gotten this so wrong, who knew what else they could have gotten wrong? I had a look through the Television Guide and the Discontinuity Guide, and mentally threw out everything I thought I knew about all the episodes they slated. From that moment on, I would judge every Doctor Who story on what it meant to me, and me alone.

So yeah, spoiler alert up front, I bloody well love The Gunfighters.

So fill up your glasses,

And join in the song.

The law's right behind you,

And it won't take long.

So come, you coyotes

And howl at the moon,

Till there's blood upon the sawdust,

In The Last Chance Saloon.

So yes, views on this story often diverge on The Ballad of the Last Chance Saloon, the narrative song which follows the action. As an attempt to try something different from the norm, I don’t mind it, and some of the lines are quite funny, but I can see why it would grate on people. Although my mind can’t help but imagine Lynda Baron narrating other stories in the series through song.

“Professor Jones isn’t well, he’s gone awfully green…”

“The Daleks are planning, exterminations.”

“The quest is the quest, watch something else now.."

Cowboys ride in on horses and shoot a sign which tells us we are at the OK Corral. It’s the Clanton brothers and they want to meet up with Seth Harper, who is helping them plot to kill Doc Holliday. Quick exposition for those at home.

It’s also worth noting that, with the use of perspective, and the ability to swing multiple horses in it, the set for that Western town is flipping huge. There’s pictures of the filming which confirm this. It might not be Sergio Leone realism, but it does the job.

We are now firmly in the era of Gerry Davis. By his early thirties, Davis had already built up an eclectic CV, having served time in the merchant Navy, Canadian radio, acted, been a translator for Italian cinema, and, most curious of all, worked in the Arctic Circle. [Naturally, of all Doctor Who episodes to be loosely based on writers own experience, it was The Tenth Planet!] In the 1960s, however, tragedy was to strike. His wife took ill, terminal cancer was diagnosed, and so both moved back to her English hometown for her final days. A friendship formed with Sydney Newman back at CBS was to prove crucial for a bereaved Davis, bringing him into the BBC as a writer. In 1966, the fast-rising Davis was chosen to replace Donald Tosh as script editor for Doctor Who.

Producer Innes Lloyd had made his name in the Outside Broadcasting team, and replaced John Wiles, who couldn’t wait to get out of Dr Who. He left them The Celestial Toymaker to patch up, and this cowboy song. The evidence of my eyes suggests this one was easier to patch up than the tedium with Mr Gough.

The TARDIS arrives in a feed store. The Doctor is still nursing his mouth. He’s got a toothache. Steven basically goes: “Hah, your fault for eating those sweets!”

Dodo immediately twigs they are in the “Wild West” and dances. She is so excited that it annoys the increasingly grumpy Doctor and his painful jaw.

“The idea of doing a Western story was my idea. Children will always adore cowboys. And I'd like to see characters from children's books come into the series.”
William Hartnell, Daily Mirror, edition dated 23 April 1966.

A man drinks by the bar, and the Clantons introduce themselves. Seth “Snake Eyes” Harper is played by the late Shane Rimmer, who was the voice of Scott Tracy in Thunderbirds, as well as having roles in Dr Strangelove, Gandhi and several James Bond films. A script writer for Gerry Anderson shows, Rimmer was also regularly in demand as the American in TV shows, having been born in Toronto, which is notable for being closer to America than Lewisham is.

His is the most American accent in a story which, to be fair, goes a bit Frasier on foreign accents.

Steven and Dodo have dressed up in the most outlandish Wild West Halloween costumes you can imagine. Tragically, Dodo’s costume is probably the sanest she had in her entire run so far. Peter Purves outfit would scream loud in a Glasgow gay bar. Fitting into the background isn’t an option here.

They are still celebrating, when a man shoots Steven’s toy gun out of his hand.

It’s Wyatt Earp.

Wyatt Earp is a mostly mythical figure of Wild West lore nowadays. This is due to the hagiographical account of his exploits, as written in the history of the Wild West by writer Wyatt Earp. Yes, his reputation as fearless marshal of the West is exaggerated greatly by his having lived long enough to write the history books on the matter! Wyatt was involved in several gunfights (though his brother Virgil – more on him later – may have been the person involved) and he co-ran a brothel at one point. He was situated in Dodge City in the 1870s before his move to Tombstone, where his family lived. He is also believed to have fixed boxing matches. There is no arguing that he is a symbol of an entire way of life, however. It’s what he would have wanted.

Dodo’s reaction to coming face to face with Wyatt Earp is essentially to enthusiastically squee so loudly she disarms the famous lawman.

DOCTOR: I don't know who you are or what right you have

WYATT: Marshall of Tombstone's my right and Wyatt Earp's my name.

DODO: Wyatt Earp! 

WYATT: Oh, something wrong, ma'am?

DODO: Oh no, it's just that, well, I always wanted to meet you and here we are face to face.

WYATT: Well, the Lord sure do move in mysterious ways, ma'am.
(All quotes from the Doctor Who Transcripts Site)

Earp takes the Doctors team to the Sheriff’s office to work out who they are.

Kate shows up for work at the bar, and Billy Clanton is too distracted by sexy to remember his plotting. The actor may have been distracted too as he almost flubs his line before saving it. Not so lucky is one of his brothers who changes his line mid-sentence to fix it. To be honest, Shane Rimmer is at that table, and his career went over half a century because he was a dependable solid actor. The three Clanton brothers don’t have Wikipedia pages and you can probably understand the disconnect in performance quality.

Seth claims he doesn’t need to meet Doc Holliday to know who he is shooting as he’s seen pictures. So he plans to sit at the bar, until the famous historical drunk shows up for a drink. Which might be one of the smartest villain plans we’ve had in the series so far, come to think of it.

What isn’t so smart is doing all this planning in front of Doc Holliday’s girlfriend, who swiftly goes off on an errand. This leaves the highly nervous barman in charge of all the gunmen and it’s the wonderful David Graham.

We are then introduced to Doc Holliday moving a dentist chair into his new premises. Kate goes to meet him, to his delight, and she immediately tells him off for claiming he was going straight when he’s got four men waiting at the Saloon bar for him.

Doc Holiday met Wyatt Earp in Texas, when he interrupted his own card game to save Earp from a potential shooting. From that point on, the two men were firm friends. A dentist with a habit of finding himself in trouble, it is now widely believed that most of the stories about Holliday were self-created. Anthony Jacobs looks a bit like him but is too old for the role, the real life John Holliday having died in his 30s, from TB contracted before his appearance at the OK Corral.

When he finds out that it’s the Clantons after him, Holliday is highly indignant.

HOLLIDAY: Clanton! You kill a guy out of sheer professional ethics, and then you've got three of his brothers chasin' after you to leave at once. That makes me real angry!

Hahaha.

Anthony Jacobs was a TV regular at the time who had recently appeared in Madame Bovary and an adaptation of the life of Richard the Lionheart. He is the best thing in this story, bringing a comic timing rarely better in the show, and in moments to come, he helps William Hartnell raise his game too, because no way is Dr Who getting outshone by the guest in his own show.

Kate orders Holliday to get out of town, but Holliday insists he will stand his grand. But his attempts to snuggle Kate are rumbled by Sheriff Bat Masterson. Masterson doesn’t trust Holliday, solely because he is well known gun man with several deaths to his record.

In a funny moment, the Doc tells the Sherriff that he hopes to see him at his dental surgery soon, and Richard Beale rubs his chin thoughtfully, but gingerly, as if he actually does have toothache but hell mend before he gets Doc Holliday to look at it! Richard Beale has several appearances in Dr Who, of which this is his largest by far. He died shortly before his 97th birthday in 2017, but he remains a regular in all your Talking Pictures archive favourites.

Masterton is annoyed at Wyatt Earp (who shows up with the TARDIS team) as Earp is well known for his friendship with Doc Holliday. Who keeps bringing murderers to town.

You can see why that might strain a working relationship.

The Doctor introduces Earp and Masterton to “Dodo Dupont and Steven Regret”, touring piano player and singer. Which strikes me as the Doctor’s revenge, given his tooth is still acting up.

It makes sense anyhow, because, as you know, names are for Tombstone, baby.

DOCTOR: Allow me, sir, to introduce Miss Dodo Dupont, wizard of the ivory keys, and er Steven Regret, tenor. And lastly sir, your humble servant Doctor Caligari.

MASTERSON: Doctor Who?

DOCTOR: Yes, quite right. I've just been satisfying the Sheriff here that we are a humble troupe of travelling players. Unfortunately, sir, at the moment between engagements.

(He means the Marshall, but it’s probably a Doctorism…)

That Doctor Caligari line really amused me as a teen. And it still does, to be frank. In fact, recently I was re-reading Basil Copper’s Amber Print, a story about a rare copy of The Cabinet which comes to life. It’s one of the very few Mezzotint stories which actually work, and I include the M.R. James story among those which don’t.

The law men send the Doctor off to Holliday’s to get his tooth sorted.

STEVEN: Look I don't know why you wanted to say it in the first place. Steven Regret? What kind of a name's that for a singer anyway?

DOCTOR: Oh, my dear young man, can't you sing a little?

STEVEN: Well yes, a little, but why say it at all?

DOCTOR: Well, I had to find some sort of suitable cover. After all, you can't walk into the middle of a Western town and say that you've come from outer space. Good gracious me, we'd all be arrested on a vagrancy charge.

STEVEN: And what about our little wizard of the keys? Miss Dupont, can you play?

DODO: I'll have a bash.

The Doctor sees the giant tooth sign for the dentist and suddenly claims his tooth is better but gets sent to the dentist by a smirking Steven. He’ll meet Steven and Dodo at the “hotel lounge” because what are the odds of them getting into trouble in Episode 1? Dodo and Steven laugh about the Doctor’s pain and head off to the bar.

The Doctor investigates the dentist’s office and walks in Doc Holliday and Kate canoodling.

DOCTOR: I, er, forgive me, sir. I, er, I should have knocked.

HOLLIDAY: What's your business?

DOCTOR: Yes, well, er, the fact is I, er, I, have a toothache.

And Doc Holliday breaks into a grin like he’s Sarah face to face with a new Pokemon toy.

The Doctor tries to escape but he’s put into the dentist chair, and William Hartnell pulls an amusing look of horror as Holliday tells Kate to leave as she “can’t stand the sight of blood”!

And then we get one of my favourite scenes in the entire show:

DOCTOR: Oh, just a minute, please. Haven't you any anaesthetic?

HOLLIDAY: What?

DOCTOR: Well er, something to sort of dull the pain, man.

HOLLIDAY: Well I could give you a rap on the cranium with this six shooter.

DOCTOR: Good gracious, certainly not!

HOLLIDAY: You're welcome to a slug o' rattlesnake oil!

DOCTOR: Oh, my dear man, I never touch alcohol.

HOLLIDAY: Well, I do.

DOCTOR: Well, I must say, this is most unprofessional. I do hope you know what you're doing.

HOLLIDAY: I never tolerated any complaints yet, in my whole life.

From the Doctor’s demand for anaesthetic, to Holliday gleefully drinking the whisky that the Doctor turned down, to William Hartnell’s horrified look of pain before the camera cuts away from his dental surgery. Even Anthony Jacobs pissed off reaction that his professionalism would be called into question, as he swigs from the bottle pre-op.

If there’s any scene which sold me on The Gunfighters, this is the one.

At the bar, the Clantons and Seth are playing cards, while Charlie The Barman nervously watches the window and then apologises to the Clantons for the lack of music. So Billy shoots a few bottles, which seems like a waste of booze to my mind.

Not to worry – in walk Steven and Dodo, who didn’t seem to notice the men rushing away there. Dodo presses the buzzer for service, and a timid Charlie appears from his hiding place! And at this point I notice the “No Shooting in the Saloon” sign. Seth Harper watches intently as Steven books three rooms for the night.

CHARLIE: Say, are you really a piano player lady?

DODO: You're darn tootin' I am.

You don’t need to cringe, Peter Purves does it for you.

Charlie immediately tries to hire both of them!

CHARLIE: I just might be able to offer you a job is all. I got no pianist on account he was shot last week.

Hah! Similar to a line used in Chibnall’s era, which was also funny.

You ever get the impression poor old Charlie’s no shooting sign isn’t working?

Steven tells off Dodo for endangering herself, mentions the Doctor, and everyone else reacts. Then Dodo tells everyone about “her friend, the Doctor” and of course, everyone thinks she means Doc Holliday. And Seth very quickly deduces Steven can’t be a real singer, but immediately assumes he must be a gun man working for Holliday.

So they bring back Dodo and Steven to the lounge.

“Good thing I didn’t need my tonsils out,” moans the Doctor, post dental surgery!

Meanwhile Seth goes off to find Doc Holliday, and stumbles across the Doctor. Keep in mind they’ve never actually met the guy they have a vendetta with. Although I am now dubious about the veracity of Snake Eyes having ever seen those pictures. Doc Holliday, for his part, overhears this meeting and hides in his back room!

HARPER: Doc!

DOCTOR: What? Yes, yes, what is it?

HARPER: Holliday!

DOCTOR: Holiday? Yes, I suppose so. Yes, you could call it that.

HARPER: My name's Harper, Seth Harper.

DOCTOR: Oh, well, I'm very glad to know you Mister Harper. Yes, I suppose you've brought a message from my friends.

HARPER: Well, a kind of a message, Doc. The boys are waitin' for you at the saloon. They'd sure like to buy you a drink.

DOCTOR: Oh, well, that's very sociable of them, but unfortunately I don't touch alcohol.

HARPER: That's not what I heard, Doc, but we'll play it your way.

So the Clantons order the Doctor to appear at the Saloon within 5 minutes, and the Doctor thinks its for a nice social drink. Meanwhile, Doc Holliday sets the Doctor up with his own gun (despite the Dr disavowing violence), and tells him to go to the saloon. A set up.

The gun has Doc Holliday’s name on it, of course.

HOLLIDAY: It sure seems a pity he bothered to have that tooth out.

The cowboys draw guns on Dodo and Steven and order them to sing a song. Dodo picks one and Steven quietly quips: “let’s hope the piano knows it”. Because it’s a player piano. Which explains how Dodo can keep tune. Worse than the guns for Steven though, is the fact that the gun men now make him sing the song!

(I do like the moment where Steven turns right into a gun in his face and double takes.)

And as Steven sings the theme tune to the story, the Doctor hobbles along the street, while the Clantons wait at the door to shoot him. He also winces on hearing Steven’s singing! It’s funny, but it’s also serious – these men plan to kill the Doctor and Steven and Dodo, and the Doctor appears to be walking directly into their trap.

Episode 1 of The Gunfighters take a good ten or so minutes to warm up, but once Doc Holliday shows up the entire thing starts to rev quite nicely, with a few genuinely hilarious scenes.

The Gunfighters

Episode 2

Kate has a change of heart and rushes off to the Last Chance Saloon to warn the Doctor and friends.

HOLLIDAY: Why must women meddle?

Doc Holliday has another gun ready.

Steven pleads with the Clantons to let him sing a new song as he really can’t stand the Ballad of the Last Chance Saloon now. See, naysayers, you are not alone.

“The use of the song was a drag. It seemed to me that every time the story began to gallop, it was slowed down to a desperate crawl by the use of the song. I also didn't like the way Lynda Baron sang.”
Sydney Newman, internal memo to Gerald Savory (Head of Serials)

So Steven sings it through grated teeth!

Kate shows up and tells off the Clantons for bringing out their guns, and Steven for his terrible singing! Kate was played by Sheena Marshe, who was the daughter of director Rex Tucker, and sister of Jane from Freddy Jane and Rod!

Steven orders Dodo up the stairs and she complains that she was enjoying herself! So she gets told off by Kate too.

Kate is taking no prisoners!

Also, I am rapidly growing the theory that Dodo is actually a sociopath addicted to the danger of travelling in the TARDIS.

Dodo goes off on a huff. “Have a good time with your new friends!”

And then Kate starts singing the Ballad of the Last Chance Saloon and dancing. This distracts everyone as the Doctor walks into the bar.

HARPER: Well, if it ain't the great Doc!

DOCTOR: Oh, you flatter me, young man. Yes, reasonably accomplished I would say, but not great.

HARPER: You can say that again.

DOCTOR: Oh, really? Why? Oh, yes, of course. We met a little while ago down at the dentist. Yes, and you so very kindly invited me to join you and your friends for a drink!

HARPER: And a little talk, Doc.

DOCTOR: Yes, quite so, quite so. Well, I'm afraid I don't touch alcohol, but a little glass of milk and I should be only too delighted. Won't you, er, introduce me?

HARPER: Yeah, yeah, give me a pleasure. Doc, I would like you to meet the Clanton brothers.

DOCTOR: The Clanton brothers. Oh dear. I mean, er, how d'you do?

No longer invisible and mute, William Hartnell is having an absolute ball with this script. This is as far as the playfully innocent Doctor lasts in The Gunfighters as he instantly recognises the name Clanton, and across his face you seen the Doctor twigging who has set him up, who they think he is, and trying to get out of a trap. That “oh dear” is prime A star Hartnell turnabout.

We’ve only got four more stories with him after this one. We need to enjoy him while he’s here. And luckily, he’s on top form tonight.

The Doctor tries to talk himself out of the issue.

DOCTOR: Oh yes I do, indeed, yes. Steven, don't you think it's time we were going?

IKE: Not just yet, Doc. We haven't had our little talk about brother Reuben. The late brother Reuben.

DOCTOR: Oh yes, I know. Yes, sometimes after a bereavement it's very difficult to find exactly the right kind of words.

IKE: The right words?

I forgot that line was coming! Genuine tears of laughter. It’s all in William Hartnell’s delivery too.

The Clantons want action, as in blood.

The Doctor suggests they talk to Wyatt Earp, but the Clantons point out that Earp and Holliday are known friends.

BILLY: Wyatt Earp and Doc Holliday. The bottle-puncher lawman and the good-for-nothing drunken gambler.

Worth noting that the Clantons and Snake Eyes haven’t noticed the actual Doc Holliday sneaking into the bar and going up the stairs right behind them.

Actual working stairs too. A lot of care went into this set.

The Doctor tries to convince them that he is not Doc Holliday, but the Clantons point out that the Doctor was in the dentists office and that he has Doc Holliday’s gun. And then Kate calls him Doc Holliday.

The Doctor takes out Holliday’s gun to denounce it, but Seth’s gun is shot out of his hand, much to the Doctor’s shock. (The work of the actual Doc Holliday from his hiding spot.)

Kate grabs a gun, and the Doctor uses the circumstances to get Steven to disarm the Clantons.

HARPER: You should have killed me when you had the chance, Doc, because you're gonna pay for this.

DOCTOR: Indeed, indeed, And may I point out that I still have the chance, sir?

HARPER: Well I don't have no gun.

DOCTOR: Exactly! That's the whole point isn't it?

And Seth is stunned by the Doctor’s lack of fair play!

Luckily for everyone, Wyatt Earp shows up.

And then arrests “Doc Holliday”, thus confirming to the Clantons that the Doctor is their enemy. Primarily so his real friend can escape.

It’s plot upon plot in Tombstone. And presumably in the nearby cemetery too.

Bat Masterton knows the Doctor isn’t Doc Holliday and tells off Wyatt.

This all leaves Steven alone with the Clantons.

Dodo is held hostage by Doc Holliday. Kate shows up. When Dodo hears the name Doc Holliday its only then, midway through Episode 2, that she shows any fear.

HOLLIDAY: Wyatt Earp's arrested him.

DODO: Arrested?

HOLLIDAY: Now why would Wyatt do a thing like that?

KATE: Because Wyatt let them go on thinkin' the old guy was you, that's why.

HOLLIDAY: Oh, yeah.

So Holliday and Dodo play cards.

The Doctor is in the jail for his own protection, given everyone thinks he is Doc Holliday now.

Steven tells the Clantons that the Doctor is not Doc Holliday, and the Clantons plan to use Steven to help them. Not in the way Steven plans.

It’s Kate and the Doc enjoying the cards, while Dodo huffs.

As the Clantons are still drinking downstairs, Doc Holliday sneaks off to his office to get his bottle from earlier.

KATE: Oh well now, if that's all that's troublin' you. You left a bottle back in your office. Why don't ya just crawl back there and get it?

HOLLIDAY: Now that's all a man needs. A real gentle, understandin' woman. I'll be back just as soon as you've finished breaking up my character.

KATE: Ain't it wonderful, honey, what a man'll do for what he truly believes in.

And Dodo grins.

Holliday reaches his dentists office only to find Wyatt Earp waiting for him.

WYATT: Only thing I want from you Doc is to get outta town.

HOLLIDAY: Now where did I put that whiskey? Why the hell should I get outta town? I ain't done nothing agin' the law.

WYATT: Not yet, you ain't. But when the Clantons finally wise up, why, there's gonna be shootin', Doc. And, I can't keep that old guy locked up in jail forever, you know.

HOLLIDAY: How long can you keep him then?

WYATT: Well, I'll release him as soon as I've told 'em the truth about you. Tomorrow morning. Now, you can ride out tonight and get yerself a head-start.

HOLLIDAY: But I only just hit town. I only just set up this business.

WYATT: Well, it'll be here when you get back. I mean, don't worry. This is just till this thing blows over.

HOLLIDAY: Would you mind tellin' me what this is all about?

WYATT: Yeah. Old Pa Clanton and his boys are running the biggest rustling operation this territory's ever seen. Pretty soon they'll be takin' over the whole of Tombstone unless something's done to stop 'em.

HOLLIDAY: Well, why don't you stop 'em then?

WYATT: Well Bat 'n me can't handle it alone. We'll stop 'em soon as my brothers get here.

HOLLIDAY: Oh, looks like you could use an extra hand.

WYATT: Well, later maybe. But in the meantime Doc, just ride out.

The thing that really riles up Doc Holliday, however, is that Wyatt Earp has drunk some of his whisky!

Steven goes off to the jail to get the Doctor, but the Clantons follow him.

Doc Holliday takes off with Kate, and Dodo too.

HOLLIDAY: Wyatt Earp is gunnin' for me, and you know that in my whole life I never killed a friend.

KATE: Ah, you're a real gentleman.

Steven warns the Doctor the Clantons are up to something. Steven gives the Doctor a gun, and he twirls it in his hands!

DOCTOR: Ten minutes. Mister Werp? Oh, er, Mister Werp. I say, can you do that?

WYATT: Nope. And I wouldn't try it if I were you.

DOCTOR: I have no intention of trying anything, only people keep giving me guns and do I wish they wouldn't. I wonder, would you mind looking after it for me?

WYATT: My pleasure. And, er, who gave it to you?

DOCTOR: Oh er, that young friend of mine, you know, Steven. A rather impetuous sort of lad.

Steven walks into the Clantons riling up a mob, and realises a bit late he is the bait in a lynch mob.

Snake Eyes is still at the bar when Doc Holliday shows up. He suddenly twigs that this man is the Doc Holliday he was there to kill, but before he can do anything, Holliday shoots him. Poor Charlie’s sign is just getting ignored by all.

There goes the only vaguely American accent among the villains.

“When are you going to break out of jail?” asks Wyatt, and the Doctor casually unlocks the cell door.

Meanwhile, the Clantons give Wyatt and the Doctor an ultimatum. Either the Doctor surrenders, or they’re going to lynch Steven in his place!

IKE: Holliday, you still in there?

WYATT: Get out of the street, Clanton. Holliday's my prisoner.

IKE: Well that's too bad, 'cause if he's ain't out of there in two minutes his friend Regret here is gonna swing in his place.

The camera cuts to Bat Masterson, who looks pissed off, then to Wyatt Earp who looks pensive, and finally to the worried Doctor trying to think of a way out…

This episode pivots around the comedic talents of William Hartnell and Anthony Jacobs, and, as they are in most of the scenes, its quite funny. Peter Purves might do a lot of “big comedic double takes” (his words) but they work amusingly in context.

The Gunfighters

Episode 3

“The first thing he’s going to do, is take Roddy Piper’s integrity. Huh? That’s like Jacques Costeau trying to find a dry spot in the ocean. I ain’t got no integrity. How do you think I got so far?”
Roddy Piper, January 1992.

And the words of Hot Rod remind me of the man and myth that is Doc Holliday. As one of the most notorious gunfighters in the Wild West, it is perhaps a surprise to see him as a man who only wants to set up his dentist’s shop. He’ll preach to the hills that he’s a man you can’t trust, a cold blooded killer (and he’s directly responsible for most of the deaths in this story) and a man who will run to the hills to save his own hide. Yet, we know long before he allows Dodo to one up him, that he’s going to return to save his friends. Anthony Jacob’s Doc is the the noble rogue, he’s The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance. When push comes to shove, when the rain starts to pour, he’ll be there for you, cause you’re there for him too…

No, sorry, hang on, that’s the Friends theme tune.

In a story which revels in deconstructing myths while creating news one at the same time, Doc Holliday’s real life enemy is about to show up. Wonder what his name was…

So yes, last time the Doctor was left facing a mob who wanted to lynch Steven.

You've a good chance of swingin',

It's your last chance to hide.

And your last chance at singin'

Till your last long ride.

RIP Lynda Baron, incidentally.

Steven tells the Doctor the mob are bluffing and Phineas Clinton quips that Steven is in for a hell of surprise!

The Doctor wants to go out there and talk to the mob, but Wyatt wont let him, and goes out the backdoor to try and do something. He goes round the back of the set.

IKE: Time's about up, Holliday. You comin' out?

MASTERSON: You're asking for it, Clanton. Time's about run out for you too, I reckon.

BILLY: Don't look that way to me. Not from where I'm standing.

MASTERSON: Where you're standing, boy, is right in line of fire of my shotgun.

The Clantons taunt the Doctor. Phineas tells Steven to choose his friends better in his next life, before getting thumped by Wyatt Earp who reappears. The crowd disperse and Wyatt unhooks Steven from the noose. The Clantons are caught in a potential crossfire so retreat.

But then Charlie The Barman shows up and tells everyone that Doc Holliday can’t be The Doctor because he was just in the bar shooting Seth Harper.

CHARLIE: If I'm drunk, your friend Seth Harper's still alive. Which he ain't.

Nice turn of phrase there.

The Clantons threaten to send a stern letter to Tombstone public committee demanding Wyatt Earp removed as Marshall. Which for a group who were willing to kill the Doctor’s companion minutes earlier, is wonderfully officious.

Phinneas is in the jail cell, and the Doctor continues to call Wyatt Earp “Mr Werp”. It’s funny every single time. The Doctor say he plans to leave Tombstone the next day, and Earp cheers.

PA: Get me Johnny Ringo. Get 'im, quick.

BILLY: But Pa, Ringo rides alone, you know that. He mightn't wanna join up with us.

PA: What was I paying Harper?

IKE: A hundred dollars.

PA: Well, offer Ringo five hundred.

IKE: Oh, come on, Pa. Nobody's worth that.

PA: Not worth it? If I had the sons who could do the job without gettin' all fouled up I wouldn't have to pay 'im. But as of now I need a top gun.

IKE: Listen, Pa, when the citizen's committee hear what we've got on Earp, they will

PA: The citizen's committee. Pack of feeble minded old women. Think they're gonna run him out office on account of what you tell 'em?

So yes, they’re going to bring Johnny Ringo, notorious shooter, into events. Full marks for Ike Clanton's sudden interest in municipal democracy, though, that cracks me up.

The Doctor and Steven are told by Charlie The Barman that Dodo left with Doc Holliday. So to find Dodo, they need to find Doc Holliday, whom Charlie thinks is a scoundrel. Must be that whole killing someone thing. This does lead to a fantastic William Hartnell line, and a Charlie retort…

DOCTOR: Now don't be ridiculous. Doc Holliday's a great friend of mine. He gave me a gun, he extracted my tooth. Good gracious me, what more do you want?

CHARLIE: His next extraction's gonna be a bullet.

Charlie’s nervousness is played well by David Graham, kids TV legend who went onto provide voices in Thunderbirds for Brains, and then everything up to Peppa Pig. He reappears in Doctor Who much later, and is still alive aged 96, though he suffered a stroke last year. He makes the role of timid snitch Charlie quite endearing when it might be annoying and shrill in a lesser talents hands.

Doc Holliday stops at a hotel on the outskirts of Tombstone, and then has an argument with Kate over his plans to return to Tombstone to help out Wyatt and Masterton. Holliday goes off to find food, and gun shots ring out.

HOLLIDAY: It's all right, ladies, it's all right. I just ran into an old friend and he er, he kinda lost his appetite.

A figure cloaked in shadows approaches the bar doors.

It’s Johnny Ringo.

Now, Johnny Ringo didn’t actually die in the Shootout at the OK Corral. He died the following July, in suspicious circumstances, which were either suicide or being shot by Doc Holliday. (Although Holliday was wanted for another murder at the time, so being in the area Ringo died is the sort of foolhardy thing that only someone with a reputation like Doc Holliday would have attempted!) Ringo was in Tombstone during the shootout. He moved there in 1879, having already killed at least two men, and announced in a fatalistic manner that he was looking forward to seeing how long it took him to die or kill a man. Both Ringo and Holliday were at one point jailed at the same time to stop either man killing the other.

While the who and what and where is murky, we know Johnny Ringo was alive in 1882. His fate in this story will be narrative convenience. Which has allowed the charge of historical inaccuracy to be levelled against the story. As opposed to Kublai Khan’s enemies being 500+ miles out of place to aide the end of Marco Polo, or people being in the wrong place in The Crusade, or Nero being too old and having a historically inaccurate court. Or the Trojan War. Or that run around with porn star Vikings. Even The Massacre changed bits to make the narrative work better. This is what Doctor Who does, it takes the cooking pot, adds as much historical facsimile to tell the tale, and then invents around. Maybe its easier to suspend disbelief when the historical differences come from fictional characters, like the Abbot of Amboise or El Akir?

Anyhow, it is what it is.

Johnny Ringo is played by the late Laurence Payne, who had already appeared in A Matter of Life and Death and The Trollenberg Terror, and had a reputation for brooding roles. He had been a RSC regular since the 1940s. He appeared in all your favourite 60s and 70s TV shows (including two other Doctor Who spots), and would often choreograph the fight scenes on his own shows. In fact, he lost sight in his eye while filming Sexton Blake, in which he played the lead role, when he was accidentally hit in the face with a sword. He retired from acting in the 1980s and went onto to create a number of respected oil paintings and also became a prolific crime novelist. He was also well known for his replies to fan mail, so it was sad to hear that in the last few years of his life, Laurence Payne suffered from vascular dementia, brought on by an attack of septicaemia, and that his family had had to publicly request that fans stopped sending him mail as he could no longer read or reply to it. A tragic final decade in a fascinating long life.

He chills his way into this story like a cold shower, changing everything around him.

Charlie sees Ringo and starts to panic.

RINGO: Double straight. Hey, how come you know my name?

CHARLIE: I guess everybody. I mean, I sure enough heard about you.

RINGO: What have you heard?

CHARLIE: Well. Nothin' sir. Nothin' at all.

RINGO: So what's your name?

CHARLIE: Charlie, sir.

RINGO: Charlie, eh? So you've heard nothing about me?

CHARLIE: No, no, I ain't.

RINGO: Ain't very flattering is it?

CHARLIE: I guess not. I mean, well, what I was meaning was...

RINGO: Yeah. Go on, go on Charlie.

Johnny Ringo charms and scares Charlie into telling him about the Clantons, but when Charlie innocently says he wonders what Wyatt Earp will make of Johnny Ringo being in town, his cards are marked.

RINGO: Oh, give it here. I'll do the pouring. You sure got the shakes real bad.

CHARLIE: It's er, it's on the house, sir.

RINGO: I never figured different.

We could play the “when was Charlie doomed?” game here. Was it when he recognised Ringo? Was it when he talked too damn much? I don’t think so. Note on his introduction, Payne takes the safety catch off his gun before he even enters the bar. He was going to kill someone, Charlie was the wrong guy in the wrong place.

Ringo goes up the stairs, turns, and shoots Charlie The Barman dead.

“Goodnight, Charlie”, he said, and went to find a bed.

Now, that’s how you make a debut. There’s an ice chill to Payne’s performance, even when he’s being (faux) amiable. We’ve had goofy (but killer) antagonists for two and a bit episodes, now the real deal’s walked into our little comedy, and his first job was to murder the town fool.

So it's curtains for Charlie,

That barman of fame.

He met Johnny Ringo

And he knew Johnny's name.

He knew Johnny's name

And he spoke it out loud.

Now Charlie the barman

Has gotten a shroud.

And to think people dislike that ballad!

We cut from Charlie’s demise to the greatest scene in Jackie Lane’s history with Doctor Who. Doc Holliday goes back to Dodo’s room, only for her to grab a gun off the dressing table and aim it at Holliday, demanding he return her to her friends.

DODO: We're leaving now.

HOLLIDAY: What're you attempting to do with that there offensive weapon?

DODO: Shoot you if I have to.

HOLLIDAY: Now how'd you reckon to get back to Tombstone without me?

DODO: I shall try not to kill you. I shall aim for your arm.

HOLLIDAY: That's real thoughtful. Just at the moment you're aiming right between my eyes.

DODO: Oh, I'm sorry. Is that better?

HOLLIDAY: It's an improvement.

The moment Holliday realises Dodo could shoot him, mostly likely by accident, his entire jovial demeanour changes. When she is no longer aiming for his temple, he acquiesces to her request, at which point Dodo nearly faints and asks for a glass of water to help cope with such a stressful situation! Kate arrives at the commotion to be told he is going back to Tombstone.

Which leads to the scene punchline:

HOLLIDAY: You stay here and I'll come back and get you.

KATE: See here, Doc Holliday, you ain't plannin' on runnin' out?

HOLLIDAY: Now Kate, for the first time in my life I have just been taken, beaten to the draw.

DODO: Oh, I honestly didn't want to have to shoot you.

HOLLIDAY: And I didn't want to have to shoot you neither.

Holliday shows off the Derringer he had trained on Dodo the entire scene, and that’s when the Doctor’s companion faints!

This is a genuinely fantastic scene, and Exhibit A for the defence that Jackie Lane was given terrible, terrible material in Doctor Who. Because it’s so rare for her to get a scene like this to work with. In The Celestial Toymaker, she is required to play a complete idiot for the sake of the plot. In The Ark, she had to play a colonial apologist briefly. Here, she retains the youthful naivety of the character, but has a spirited gung-ho nature to add to it, coupled with not a little bit of resourcefulness and courage. Lane clearly revels in getting some of the comedic set pieces to work on, too. It's fantastic the way she’s even apologetic as she aims a weapon in someone’s face. If the Gunfighters is anything, and it’s a lot of things, then one of them is Dodo’s finest hour as a regular.

Also, Anthony Jacobs has a brilliant Mutley-esque laugh.

Charlie is still dead at the bar, and the Doctor and Steven don’t notice this until Steven nearly sits on the dead mans hand and does a Big Comedic Purves Double Take. Johnny Ringo was sitting snoozing waiting for them. Ringo tells them Holliday killed Charlie, at which point Steven is the only person foolhardy enough to grab Ringo by the shoulder. Payne shoots him a “oh you didn’t just do that” look before pretending to arrange going to find Holliday with Steven.

It's worth noting that Laurence Payne is 15 years too old for the role of Johnny Ringo here. It’s also worth noting that I don’t give a toss.

DOCTOR: You see, a young lady of our acquaintance is with him.

RINGO: And what are you going to do when you find him?

STEVEN: I, er, well we'll take her away from 'im and bring her back here of course.

RINGO: Plannin' on gunnin' him down, eh?

DOCTOR: Oh certainly not, sir, certainly not. I mean, we're just going to er, well, er, reason with him.

RINGO: Now that I'd really like to see.

The Doctor does recognise him, but isn’t foolish enough to say to his face.

Warren Earp shows up, to tell Wyatt that Morgan Earp is busy with a range war in Abalone. (Morgan also died in 1882. Warren Earp is told he is too young to hold a gun by Wyatt. In real life, Warren Earp was only 7 years younger than Wyatt, and was in his mid 20s by the time of the shootout at the OK Corral. He also survived the incidents of the story, and lived until 1990, when, as a notorious bully who rode high on his family name, he was killed in a bar fight.)

The Doctor summarises the plot for Earp and Masterton.

WYATT: You mean Regret has gone after Holliday alone?

DOCTOR: No, no, my dear Marshall, no. He's gone with a young man by the name of Ringo.

WYATT: Ringo?

MASTERSON: Ringo!

DOCTOR: Yes, yes. You've got a photograph of him here, look.

He points at a wanted poster!

He also lets Wyatt know that Charlie The Barman is dead. John Alderson’s Wyatt Earp is increasingly frustrated by everyone around him!

John Alderson lived to be 90, incidentally. Between Payne, Alderson, Richard Beale (Masterson) and the still living David Graham, a number of the cast of this story lived to fine old ages indeed. This was sadly countered by Victor Carin, who will play Virgil Earp, and who died when he was 48.

Warren is left in charge of the jail while Wyatt and Bat go to the Last Chance Saloon.

Ringo and Steven arrive at the hotel and walks back into the shadows to surprise Kate. Yes, in this, Ringo is the spurned lover. It makes narrative sense. Ties everything in a bow. Though fictional.

Big Nose Kate (you ever noticed the history books of the time were written by men?) was the only person Doc Holliday considered his intellectual equal. From the time he met her in a brothel until his death, they lived as man and wife. If you believe her view of events, Holliday got depressed anytime he had to kill someone. (This is the problem with getting the real picture of a man when those who lived to tell the history loved him!) She outlived two partners, her second husband dying of suicide, and died aged 90 in 1940.

And her fictional counterpart has been captured by Johnny Ringo who, knowing the Doc returned to Tombstone, is returning for a showdown, also.

In the jail, Warren is taunted by Phineas, and doesn’t twig the other Clantons are in the jail, guns in hand. Warren goes for a gun and is shot. Ike gets Phineas out of the jail and that’s our cliffhanger.

25 minutes enlivened substantially by the presence of Laurence Payne, and when it wasn’t bad before that…

Episode 4

The Gunfighters

You know what's a good western? The Good, The Bad and the Ugly. Barry Letts would borrow elements of the cinematography when he was a Doctor Who director. You know who doesn’t like westerns? Jeremy Bentham. Not the one you're thinking of now! More on the relevant one later.

The Doctor and the two law men lift their hats in respect as Charlie is covered by a shroud.

DOCTOR: How do you know that the killer was Ringo?

MASTERSON: On account of it must have been him or you, and I don't figure you killed Charlie the barman. Of course if'n you wanna persuade me different?

DOCTOR: Certainly not, my dear Sheriff.

Wyatt Earp still thinks the gun being shot out of Seth’s hands (done by the actual Doc) was the work of the Doctor, and so makes him deputy sheriff.

DOCTOR: Well. this is utterly absurd. Nothing will ever induce me to raise a gun in anger.

Doctor Who, providing the moralistic figure for kids at home.

Virgil Earp shows up to meet everyone.

The Doctor casually puts his hand down on the bar only to realise there’s a dead body there.

The Clantons celebrate shooting Warren Earp, and Pa Clanton notes they’ve declared war.

The older Werp brothers find Warren, who lived just long enough to croak out a goodbye.

MASTERSON: I'll get a warrant for 'em, Wyatt. I'll get 'em, you know that.

WYATT: You'll get 'em? Virgil!

VIRGIL: Yes, Wyatt?

WYATT: Ride on out to the Clantons and tell 'em we'll be waitin' for 'em come sun up.

MASTERSON: Now listen, Wyatt. There's a right and a wrong way of doing this.

WYATT: Stay out of this, Bat.

MASTERSON: This ain't legal, Wyatt. If'n you uphold the law you don't go startin' a private feud.

WYATT: You gonna try 'n to stop me?

MASTERSON: No, Wyatt, but I can't go along with ya. The law says that no

WYATT: The law? The law can't bring my kid brother back. Virgil and me's gonna step outside of the law.

The friendship between Bat and Wyatt is cracked, and the Shootout is announced.

Wyatt is left to fully load his revolver.

Steven has found himself a hostage for the third in three weeks.

PA: Long way from Dodge City, ain't ya Marshall?

VIRGIL: Reckon you know why I'm here. Your boys killed my kid brother, Clanton.

PA: Well now there's two sides to every

VIRGIL: Ain't here to argue. Just to say that Wyatt 'n me'll meet 'em at the OK Corral at sun up.

IKE: And have a posse waitin'? You're crazy.

VIRGIL: Masterson's got no part in this, neither has the law. Just a little private business to settle between our two families.

PHINEAS: And supposin' we don't go?

VIRGIL: Then we'll come a-lookin'.

Virgil then tries to free Steven but “Regret stays here”…

IKE: Well, it looks like we got 'em. Two to four.

RINGO: You mean I got 'em two to one.

PHINEAS: How'd you figure that out? We'd be there too.

RINGO: Sure you'd be there waitin' for 'em. Kinda like cheese in a mousetrap.

BILLY: Now look

RINGO: Ah shut up, Billy. You ain't got a hope in hell agin them two, only you ain't old enough to know it.

IKE: So what do we do?!

RINGO: Let me earn my money, why don't you? I'll take 'em from behind while you face 'em.

BILLY: Never figured you for a back-shooter, Ringo.

RINGO: I never figured you for any kind of a shooter Billy, which is why we'll do it my way, okay? Real careful.

Virgil tells the Doctor that Steven is with the Clantons, and that he saw the Ringo’s horse. The two Earps prepare to take on all the Clantons and Ringo, 4 on 2.

DOCTOR: Oh, this is sheer madness, Mister Sheriff. You can't take on the Clantons and Ringo.

HOLLIDAY: They won't have to.

And in walks Doc Holliday like the hero of the day. Holliday claims he was taken back to Tombstone by gunpoint, before introducing Dodo who walks in twirling a gun which Doc takes off her quickly before she injures herself! Dodo gives the Doctor a big old hug.

HOLLIDAY: Well now, where do we meet these Clantons?

VIRGIL: We? Now see here, Wyatt, I don't take kindly to fighting alongside an outlaw, friend of yours or no.

HOLLIDAY: Suit yourself, Virgil. I'll just wish you good luck and go off to find my Kate.

VIRGIL: Oh, you'll find her at the Clantons.

HOLLIDAY: What's that you say?

WYATT: Yeah, with Johnny Ringo.

HOLLIDAY: Johnny Ringo?

VIRGIL: I saw them myself, while or two back.

HOLLIDAY: I'll be fightin' beside you two tomorrow mornin' whether you like it or not.

DOCTOR: But this is ridiculous, gentleman. Can you not uphold the law without using firearms?

WYATT: Well, old friend, now I've got Doc Holliday back, why, you can hand in your badge any time you want to, Pop.

DOCTOR: Oh, good heavens, what a relief. Here you are, Bat, there's your badge and there is your wretched weapon!

HOLLIDAY: Wyatt, how you proposin' to handle this little Clanton matter?

WYATT: Well, just walk right up there and face 'em.

HOLLIDAY: You reckon old Pa Clanton will play it that simple?

VIRGIL: Well, they'll reckon they're four to two.

HOLLIDAY: One of them four is Johnny Ringo. I ain't lining up for no square dance. I'm gonna play this my way.

WYATT: So what's your way?

DOCTOR: Yes, what is your way, Doctor Holliday?

So, Wyatt Earp isn’t keen on fighting alongside Doc Holliday, because of his reputation for killing. Holiday wants to protect Kate, and get revenge on Johnny Ringo, and all in the midst of this, the Doctor tries to keep the peace but accidentally keeps antagonising it more. And at the mere mention of Ringo’s name, all the jovial amiability in Anthony Jacobs performance drops like a shot, and the audience twig, if they haven’t already, that his goofy exterior is a case of Columbo syndrome to make his enemies unaware. He's great in this, and William Hartnell is great, and it's a joy to watch two actors on top form like this. And Hartnell manages five different intonations of disapproval in the last line quoted above!

Poor old Bat Masterton. He really wants everyone to respect the law, as it falls apart around him.

The jokes are all gone now, though Hartnell nearly succeeds in making Jacobs corpse, something he’s been blatantly trying to achieve for the entire production!

DOCTOR: Yes, but I'm not just worrying about Steven, my dear. What about this man Mister Werp? Supposing he gets killed? Who is going to uphold law and order in this territory? Why they couldn't let Masterson handle the affair I don't know, with a posse of deputies, and at the end of it let the Clantons get a fair trial.

MASTERSON: Proud to hear you say so, Doctor. If'n you feel that way there's something you can do. I've tried all I know to talk Wyatt out of this and he won't listen. I'm asking you to go talk to the Clantons. Seems like that's our only chance.

DOCTOR: Me? But my dear Sheriff, I should have thought you were the one to convince

MASTERSON: No, no, they know me for a friend of Wyatt's. But if'n you go to 'em wearing your badge, say you'll guarantee them a fair trial, it might just persuade 'em. Me, I'd rather face trial than Wyatt, Virgil and Holliday together.

Masterson asks the Doctor to go make peace with the Clantons, and the Doctor being the Doctor, he makes his best shot at peace envoy to stop a fixed point in time…

Steven debates the ethics of murder with Pa Clanton. When he says that the strategy they picked is unfair, the dad points out, with a strong degree of logic, that he doesn’t want his sons to actually die. The Doctor arrives to try and talk peace but it’s all far too late. Which is a shame, as William Hartnell revs into full on Doctor Mode, lecturing Pa Clanton.

STEVEN: Oh, they aren't taking any chances, Doctor. Johnny Ringo's going be behind the Earps.

PA: One more yap outta you, Regret, you're dead, boy.

DOCTOR: Ah tut, tut, tut, tut, tut. If you are alluding to the presence of Mister Ringo, I can assure you, sir, that that also has been anticipated. They're quite ready for him.

PA: Okay, supposing they are? There's still only two of them against four.

DOCTOR: You have been sadly misinformed. Doctor Holliday is there also.

And Hartnell barks out the last line. Angry First Doctor! He’s increasingly in a foul mood at all the guns and talk of death casually around him. The Doctor has been the straight man in his own TV show, but now all the jokes have stopped, and death is in the air, he’s the one burning brightest as a beacon of tolerance and respect.

I’m going to miss him when he leaves in a few stories.

Pa Clanton’s note on hearing Doc Holliday is about can be summed up as “Aw, bugger it”.

Both sides set up their positions in the upcoming gunfight.

The shooting starts. It was the time of the preacher, but the lesson's over and the killing's begun...

Johnny Ringo starts to stalk Doc Holliday, only for Dodo to call out a warning. Ringo grabs Dodo as a hostage and Doc drops his gun, only to shoot Ringo dead with the concealed Derringer he revealed in the last episode. First rule of Chekhov’s Gun. Have a gun. And since he showed us it, he had to shoot someone with it.

HOLLIDAY: Ah now Missy, you sure do perplex me. Go on now, you get the hell outta here.

DODO: I'm sorry, Doc. I was only trying to help.

HOLLIDAY: You try to help me any more, you'll be the death of me. Go on!

He has begrudging respect for Dodo, you know.

Holliday then shows up alongside the Earps (who have been hit by none of the ten million bullets the Clantons have shot in their direction) and fires off a finishing line on Johnny.

HOLLIDAY: Ringo was here.

WYATT: And?

HOLLIDAY: He ain't no more.

The Gunfight at the OK Carroll is dynamically shot for a set (although the guns obviously don’t go close to the actors), but ends the way you’d expect. With the Clantons dead. Ike is last left, and is coldly shot by Wyatt, Virgil and Doc in turn, to make sure of his death.

The Doctor and friends say goodbye to Doc Holliday and Kate, who need to leave Tombstone due to a warrant.

DOCTOR: Oh, my dear Dodo, my dear Dodo. You know you're fast becoming a prey to every cliche-ridden convention in the American West. And it's high time we left.

The Doctor, hanging a lampshade on everything.

The Doctor then lands the TARDIS elsewhere, in an age of peace and prosperity, as a man overlooks the TARDIS.

And this ends the Gunfighters, which is a special bit of Doctor Who. Partly a comedy, partly a cold look at vendetta, it bends the real life story to tell a Doctor Who tale of pride and sin. It takes away the mask of cowboy stories, and shows that, at the heart of them, its all about vain trigger happy killers who murder far too easily. The jokes drop out of the tale, pretty much the second Johnny Ringo walks into it. But the danger of the situation is evident from early on, and if the scenes are out of Shakespearean farce at times, the characters, for the most, aren’t. Between that, some fine actors, and a good outing for the regulars, there is a lot to love in The Gunfighters. And if the ethics, the jokes, the song, the acting, the dialogue, the sets, the story and the daft accents aren’t for you, there’s always Peter Purves Big Comedic Double Takes. And a person who tires of those is tired of life.

What the Gunfighter is, is hard to pigeonhole. It’s only partly a comedy, and it’s not as dark as The Massacre, because for one thing, less people die. It’s a Doctor Who pseudo-Western which takes the trappings of the genre to tell a Doctor Who story. I love it.

It’s also got a meeting of minds between The Doctor and Doc Holliday, two characters who use the exact same tricks to get one over on their opponents and so grow increasingly frustrated at their inability to trick the other.

What the Gunfighters proves is that fandom is 100% subjective in its opinions. I am not wrong for loving the Gunfighters as much as Ian Levine is not wrong for hating it. What makes this little TV show grand is that it can fit both our opposing viewpoints, and continuing to invite new ones, even nearly 60 years on. Life is too short to worry about it.

As for Peter Haining’s book which tore apart the story, those words were written by big name Doctor Who fan of the time Jeremy Bentham.

He wrote in the 1980s that:

“What made this serial so poor is the cumulative effect of so many bad points which on their own would be forgiven in most other stories. The script was pure Talbot Rothwell, the acting was not even bad vaudeville and the direction was more West Ham than West Coast.”

Now one does feel a bit sorry for the man. He's become best known for writing that Dr Who review that vast chunks of modern fandom, who weren’t even born at the time it was written, quote to denounce. Here I am, not even born when he wrote it, quoting it to disagree… And I mean, it's 2022, we've got     ¤¤¤¤loads of positive reviews for The Gunfighters now. Even Sandifer loves it! And every single positive review reacts as though this is a new perspective!

However, Talbot Rothwell wrote Carry On Up The Khyber, which even if dated, remains a fine British comedy classic. As for West Ham, in May 1966, they were about to send Bobby Moore, Martin Peters and Geoff Hurst off to win the World Cup with England. So, when the chips are down, I think we should all thank Jeremy for this unintended compliment, well earned for a fine piece of Doctor Who!